Life Is Like Hot Soup: Don't Scald Yourself
Proximity, the absolute best way to balance
Dear Friends,
If life had a mascot, I think it would be a bowl of steaming hot soup!
Nothing beats a bowl of soup on a cold winter’s day, right? It's so comforting, nourishing, and a little temperamental, but that’s what makes it so special! Get too close and you’ll burn your tongue, but stay too far away and you’ll be sipping a cold broth. Now, as someone who balances life, retirement remix, and the joyful chaos of a family that takes turns traveling, I’ve realized: the art of getting the soup just right is the perfect metaphor for everything!
Let me explain.
The Soup and the “Encore Mindset”
Retirement may feel like that first sip of soup: You think you can just sit back, ladle in hand, and enjoy. But, my friend, you’re in for a surprise! At first, the soup (freedom) feels too hot. What do you do with all this time? Traveling, exercise, and daydream? Then, without warning, it starts cooling. Oops, do I just binge-watch Blossoms Shanghai for the third time?
My retirement remix embracing the encore mindset reminds me that the second stage of life is all about finding that sweet spot between being idle and overbusy. It’s about savoring each moment, one spoonful at a time.
Oh my, is it too hot for you? Just give it some space, my friend.
Is it too cold for you? Why not reheat it with a little purpose?
You could even try something unexpected, like boxing at Equinox or getting on a United flight for a hometown visit! (Spoiler alert!) It's never too late to make some changes in your life!
Just don’t spill the soup all over your lap, okay?
Relationships: Don’t Hover Over the Pot
Take my role as a grandparent. I love my grandkids. Love them. But love, like soup, has rules. You can’t just carry the bowl to their school screaming, “Look! I made soup!”
You’ll embarrass them, and let’s be honest, you’ll spill half of it in your rush to get there.
Instead, prioritizing relationships and connection means respecting the temperature. Too far? The soup cools, those little moments of joy, like jumping into leaf piles or chatting about their day, might evaporate. Too close? You’re scalding everyone with over-attention, accidentally muttering “how’s your work/school today?” under your breath one too many times.
The trick is to know your place: show up with the soup when it’s just warm enough to be enjoyed, not when it’s burning everyone’s lips.
Trust me, it makes you look like the world’s wisest chef.
Stir Gently
In the wonderful world of kaffeemocha, balance is everything. “Being” is watching the soup simmer, feeling its warmth fill the room, and letting the moment be enough. “Doing” is adding ingredients, some spice, maybe a little laughter, or a dash of intentional action like writing this essay for you (yes, dear reader, I’m stirring the pot).
Too much “being,” and you’re staring at the soup until it boils over, existential, but pointless. Too much “doing,” and you've over-seasoned it, now nobody wants to taste it. So, when I’m walking through Central Park with my wife, sipping a latte at Birch Coffee, or picking up the grandkids on a backup opportunity, I’m both being and doing. I’m the master soup-stirrer, always close enough to keep things warm but wise enough not to spill.
Thinking Like an Outlier
This thinking mindset applies to soup strategy, too. Some people relocate far away to save tax (let’s call that “moving soup to Alaska”), and others cling too tightly (hovering over the stove, refusing to let go). Not me. I prefer the New York strategy, stay close enough to serve the soup while it’s hot and still have time to grab a latte and enjoy the view.
Sure, there is an extra price tag to pay to live in NYC, but you know what’s priceless? Being around when your grandkids learn to drop the training wheel from tricycle, finding an excuse to walk in Central Park, and having a community that challenges you to keep growing. Outliers know it’s about what warms the soul, and that, my friends, is worth the premium of a bowl of metaphorical soup.
Cultivate Resilience
Life doesn’t always make it easy to carry hot soup. Sometimes the wind blows, you stumble over a crack, or someone tells you you’re too late to start something new. In those moments, I channel the koffeemocha essence of cultivating resilience through strategic risk-taking.
I remind myself: Sure, the soup might splash a little. Maybe it will cool faster than I planned. But as long as I keep moving, carefully, deliberately, it will still get where it needs to go. Whether I'm having koffeemocha moments with someone going through a life transition or remixing my own encore, the lesson holds true: the soup is just warm enough to taste.
My Ladle of Love and Gratitude
This year I am grateful for the balance in my life.
I can see my family and friends when I want, hold the warmth of their laughter, and still have enough space to savor my own journey.
The koffeemocha way is about knowing when to step forward and when to step back, letting life simmer to its perfect temperature.
And if you spill a little along the way?
Don’t worry, there’s always more soup, and the best part of life is learning how to carry it.
Happy holidays, and may your bowls always be full, warm, and just the right distance away.
Kefei
koffeemocha in Pleasanton